I love to masturbate. Sometimes I like it more than sexual contact with a woman. It’s private. I get to think about anyone and look
A lot of times I’ll open up multiple tabs on my browser with pics that turn me on and jerk off looking at all of them. Other times I’ll 
These are the things I masturbate to. I think I’m going to go jerk off now. Maybe I’ll be looking at pics of you.
A common lament in believer – non-believer discussions is believers demanding respect for their beliefs or the sincerity of it and sometimes for themselves.
Non-believers, free-thinkers and atheists don’t seem to be as hung up on respect as believers are. Kinda like believers are way more obsessed with gay sex than gay people.
I think that this demand for respect stems from their authority fetish. The world view that believers tend to have is a rigid framework with a clear hierarchy of authority: god to to their religious leader, down through the priesthood ranks and finally to the laypeople. People who believe in a personal god, I suppose include some sort of hot-line that bypasses the other people between them and their god.
Many of the rules in religions are focused on submitting to various levels of higher authority – often starting with the parents to the religion’s priesthood ranks to god.
In Christianity, about half of the commandments are authority worship. And the purpose of authority worship is controlling people.
So, that makes it curious to me why anyone thinks that this is the basis for a moral code at all -which is a whole other blog – since there’s nothing about evaluating the authority for worthiness and no restrictions on the behaviour of said authority.
So it’s also curious – and a future blog on belief and hypocrisy – that so many of the isolationist and anti-government groups are right wing believers. So, they are failing the commandment idea that they hold most important.
So, when believers demand respect, they are really asking for submission. Unconditional at that.
Respect is earned, not bestowed.
Believers do not earn respect when they sincerely believe the atheist is going to hell, when they outright lie and misconstrue or are plain ill-informed about science concepts.
ID/Creationist Believers also insist on excessive proof – based on their misunderstanding science no less – to accept even basic science terminology and expecting to not have to provide any at all for their religious claims. They also fall into the trap of if science can’t prove something 100%, then all science must be wrong adn religion wins by default.
But that is a false choice and science is never about 100% certainty. It’s best conclusion given the information we have. When new information becomes available, it’s peer reviewed and the conclusion is revised.
So, it’s pretty funny that believers cannot handle ambiguity and change, yet they base their absolutist and certainty on religion, which has no evidence or proof and is entirely based on subjective feelings and personal preference reinforced by confirmation bias.
Believers also like to paint atheists as rude – as if this was the worst thing a person could be and pointing out that being rude is hardly on par with suicide bombers and shooting abortion doctors on the badness scale…. well, they don’t generally have a response for that.
The idea of respect in a conversion in which the believer is misrepresenting scientific concepts, dismissing religious people caught in controversies as “not real ones”, does not understand logic or debate rules as evidenced by the “You haven’t changed my mind, so I won” attitude and who sincerely believes that the atheist is going to an unpleasant afterlife – and enjoys that “fact”.
How can you respect any of that or the person spouting it?
How can the person spouting that party line of disrespect, who offers no respect for the conversation and the opposing participants, honestly expect to be respected?
I respect the right to opinions and expression of same. But that’s a blanket respect for rights, not people or their particular beliefs.
I also hold myself to the standard of having to earn respect for myself and my beliefs. If I can’t, by my conduct earn it or by my logic earn it for my belief, then I don’t have your respect.
And that’s okay with me, because my beliefs are not dependent on other people’s respect or acceptance.
We all have the same information or access to information. That we all draw different conclusions from that is what makes the world an interesting place.
Until someone insists that theirs is the only correct conclusion and worse, that it should be self evident to all expect the childish and immoral people like atheists, free thinkers, non-heterosexuals and really, even believers in other faiths or in other versions of their own faith.
And really, who is being the child in that situation?
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It’s also funny to me that the expression “With all due respect” is usually used to indicate that no respect is owed or forthcoming.
…but if my friend’s ex does stop spewing lies about her, I’m going to gut that bitch with a plastic spoon.
(Deep breath) Okay. Now that I’ve got that bit of violence out of my system, the story:
One of my good friends, Bell, is a lesbian and, quite honestly, very fussy and demanding. However, she is a decent person, wonderfully intellegent, and a loyal friend. She started dating this girl who, again quite honestly, was far too needy to be compatible with her. Which was mentioned to Bell on several occasions. But Bell really cared for this girl, needy and energy-draining qualities and all, and so myself and her other friends kept quiet. Well, mostly.
The relationship was pretty rocky, to say the least. Though, in all fairness, they both did put in a great deal of effort to make things work. The Girl did her best to be not demanding. Bell did her best to be more sensitive to The Girl’s needs. But things went south, fast. The Girl, literally, was draining the life out of Bell. My friend was reduced to tears some nights because she just couldn’t handle the massive guilt trip that The Girl employed. The Girl, I found out from some mutual friends, was in similar states due to Bell’s inability to drop whatever she was doing to attend to The Girl’s needs.
All friends involved in the drama advised our respective parties to end it.
Bell, eventually, put her foot down and did.
Chaos and tears flowed.
Now, about three weeks later, The Girl has started her own blog. The headline story? The debut post? About how “that bitch” had messed her up so bad, treated her awfully. She accused my friend of being emotionally abusive when I know (and everyone who has ever met Bell knows) that isn’t true. Bell did her best to make due with the problems a girl she cared about a great deal had. The fact that The Girl doesn’t appreciate this–Hell, the fact that she doesn’t even recognize this–is what angers me most. And the fact that she’s spreading these lies about her where anyone can read them… Well, yeah, that angers me too.
I don’t consider myself particularly violent. However, I’m protective of my friends. There’s is very little I wouldn’t do for them.
Wondering If I Should Invest In A Sharpener For My Sword,
~Strawberry Wine
I had a discussion with a young gentleman yesterday about a class we are in together. Specifically, we discussed an article by Wittig that argues that lesbians are not real women and that all women should become lesbians to remove the class distinction between men and women. Honestly, the details of that article are irrelevant to what is on my mind, but if you’re really curious about the article, let me know.
Anyway. So, I mentioned to him that I agree that lesbians are not women. Womanhood is a social construct and only in relation to men, so females who do not relate themselves to men are not women. During the conversation, the gentleman I was speaking with mentioned that it follows that gay men are not real men either.
At first, I agreed quickly. If lesbians are not women, gays are not men. However, I’ve been thinking about and I am unsure if that is a fair conclusion. Man is the absolute, the subject. Man is what is and woman is what is not. If man is the absolute, what makes one a man?
I have been so focused on what makes a one a woman that I seem to have entirely missed the question of what makes one a man. Since having a uterus does not make a woman, does it still follow that having a phallus does not make one a man? I imagine that it would be the embodiment of those male traits that women so aptly lack that makes one a man. But even this has its flaws given the assumption that man is the absolute. So which man? As man is the absolute, man is without flaw, does the actual nature of an individual man truly have anything to do with anything? While I have contended that manhood and womanhood are both social constructs rather than something biological and concrete, I have only argued for the sake of females as representing the “other”, the “negative”, and the “has not”. So then, what defines the “subject”, the positive”, and the “has”? Does the rule of lesbians being not women as they are not related to men follow that gays are not men as they do not relate to women? That seems to fail logically. Something that is positive is still positive whether a negative is presented or not. A hill is a hill even if there is no hole present. Perhaps that was a bad analogy. Moving on.
If men are both positive and neutral, and women are negative, then men do not require the identification of women to still be men. However, you cannot have a negative without the relation of a positive or neutral.
I pose that perhaps lesbians are not women as they are not related to the positive nature of men, this does not automatically mean that gay men are not men as a man does not need a woman to be a man. A woman, however, needs a man to be a real woman.
Every now and then I read something I’ve written and am shocked to find things that some would consider so against the female sex.
A lesbian high school student embroiled in a legal flap over her school’s prom policy has received a $30,000 scholarship on The Ellen DeGeneres Show.”
Constance McMillen was speechless Friday when the talk show host pulled out an oversized check from the Web site Tonic.Com, a digital media company.
DeGeneres says she admires McMillen for challenging Itawamba County School District rules that would prevent her from escorting her girlfriend to the prom. The school district canceled the April 2 prom after McMillen’s request.
A hearing is scheduled Monday in federal court in Aberdeen on American Civil Liberties Union efforts to force the district to hold the prom.
-”The BklynBandette.” Mr. Hollywood’s Co-Defendant.
First, a catholic parochial school kicked out two kids for having lesbian parents, then there was the gay prostitution ring involving Vatican ushers and of course the fact that the Pope himself is implicated in covering for a pedophile while he was Archbishop in Germany. I’m not sure whether to cry, laugh or be outraged. Perhaps I’ll be all three and let Jon Stewart handle the commentary.
Lacey Stone and Jessica Clark over on Sweat City, in their “Lesbian Love” video segment, have some advice about straight girl crushes and unrequited love:
LL 119 Straight-Girl Crushes from lacey stone on Vimeo.
Thoughts…
This was (and is) the story of my life, pretty much: I don’t haunt lesbian bars or parties (largely because I’m apprehensive about the prospect of dating someone who may be a heavy drinker) and so I end up crushing a lot (a lot, a lot a lot a lot) on women I encounter in everyday life, who are usually straight. Trying this approach worked very, very well for me for my first serious crush on a woman (or, to be honest, on most anyone), and has failed me systematically every time since, but that hasn’t stopped hope from springing eternal, and me from believing that somehow it’s “purer” or “better” to seek out queer women amongst the straight hordes. And at this point I’m so used to being shot down by straight women, and having queer women not be interested in me, that I’m pretty down on my chances. Lacey and Jessica address how it’s not, ultimately, productive to get emotionally tangled up with straight women (though, yes, it’s fun).
They make the point that it’s safe, too, “for both parties”, one I don’t really understand. Sure, it’s safe for me–I don’t have to deal with serious rejection (except for when they insist for weeks that they’re actually bi before it turns out they’re either fooling themselves or doing it to attract a boy–oh my, Tip, bitter much?). But how is it safe for the straight woman? One of my greatest fears is that I come off as somehow predatory (especially in the wake of my very bad relationship); I sit by and yearn, and don’t want to come off as manipulative or stalker-ly while I’m doing so, because women are, due to gender roles and societal expectations, in a vulnerable position. They/we are taught to fear crushes that don’t go away, or people who are a little too obsessive in their devotion. How is it different when it comes from a woman than when it comes from a man? (“Don’t judge yourself,” they say in the video, without explaining too much about what they mean–maybe this is it.)
They also discuss “sucking it up and telling them”, which, to be honest–and this might be a sign of my immense immaturity–I’ve never found to be a productive pursuit. Never mind the stigma that queerness still carries (and how subconscious stigma can be abruptly brought to the forefront when the person with the stigma is the crush object!)–the incredible (perceived?) awkwardness that ensues tends to be so overpowering that I feel compelled to all-but break off the “let’s just be friends” deal that follows, in a very definite version of the “distance” and “cord-cutting” that they mention in the video. I’ve lost more than a few friends by telling them I love them. At this point I’m not interested in losing more.
At this point, too–after so very long of trying to woo straight women, with no success!–I’ve found myself feeling increasingly pathetic and desperate. Any relationship–even dysfunctional ones with men–feels nice, simply because it fills a need and makes me feel loved. And every woman I crush on, ever, who seems to show the slightest bit of interest, ends up feeling like the last woman in the world.
It’s not a functional, happy, sane model. But Lacey and Jessica have some advice on fixing it.
Also: Lacey and Jessica’s wedding pic at the top of that link is adorable, and worth the click in and of itself.
