Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I just wanna BE OK, BE OK, BE OK

Johanna’s in tha houze!! Yeah, you heard me. I’m here. Having a blast while Michelle’s out peeing Rosco…not really. I already miss Michelles company. Anyhoo, I’m going to tell you a bit of my day and then you can comment about yours! That sounds pretty darn funny, eh? No, prolly not.

This day started with me waking up and going to work. One of my instructors is a colortechnician so she wanted to try out these new haircolors on me. So I thought, hey why not? So my haircolor is now red/orange/yellow/purple! I know it sounds a bit..weird but I can promise you this; I’m hot as hell.

Now Michelle’s back and we’re going to have lots and LOTS of fun. Not in a sexual way. Bye!

Yeah, Michelle’s here!!! As in, Michelle’s speaking. It’s not Johanna, ICH SWEARS. Anywho, about the whole “not in a sexual way” it was a big, fat lie. I’m not saying I’M LESBO, but she’s bigger than me, and could easily rape me if she wanted to. But you can’t rape the willing, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Diversity in Health and Care 2009 (Vol. 9 No. 3)

Fade Fave: Improving lesbian, gay and bisexual healthcare: a systematic review of qualitative literature from the UK

Fade Skinny: There is evidence that lesbian, gay and bisexual (LGB) individuals have poorer experiences of health care compared with the general population but the causes are not entirely clear. The authors carried out a systematic review to examine the experience of health care provision in the UK for LGB patients. The article identifies the following areas as important for improving health service provision: Protocols; confidentiality, LGB-friendly resources and GP training.

A copy of this article is available from Fade Library

Saturday, September 26, 2009

if you ask me, every corner house around here is suspect

baltimore has a reputation for at least a couple things. one is murder. another is, um, drugs. (ok, remind me why we’re living here again?) another (less scary one, depending one neighborhood you’re in) is corner bars. we have a lot of corner bars around here, esp where we live. there’s also corner stores. annnnd…corner funeral homes.

i pretty much forget about the funeral homes, b/c i pass certain ones so often. but when we’re taking walks thru the neighborhood, it dawns on me:

wait, those really *are* corner funeral homes. and ppl live next to them. like, they share walls. they share–gulp–basement walls. and you know what happens in the basement of funeral homes…

there are only four rows of bricks that separate us from our neighbors. i know this b/c we gutted our rowhouse before we moved in (it was a bonafide boarded-up crackhouse when we bought it, blood stains on the carpet, needles in the walls, the whole nine yards) and we got to know the anatomy of the average baltimore rowhouse pretty well. and i will be damned if there’s only a couple feet of brick separating me from the inner-workings of a funeral home. (i mean absolutely no offense to any funeral home owners or workers that might be reading this; i give huge props to you guys) i mean, geez, i have enough trouble going down to our basement as it is.

so here’s what got me thinking about all of this:

we’re out for a nice long city walk yesterday morning, and there was a corner funeral home just ahead of us. i tend to really scrutinize buildings and peer down alleys while we’re walking around, i don’t know why, i’m just curious, i guess, and i really zoomed in on this place.

we’re walking right next to it, and i see a basement window. i notice that it’s 100 percent open and also in the exact size and shape of a…yeah. a coffin. and there’s a fan perched in the open window. and it’s…it’s on. holly noticed it, too. and then we both held our breath and were like ewwwwwwwww……

“you couldn’t pay me enough to live next to a funeral home!” i said.

“um, yeah,” holly said.

“hell, you couldn’t pay me enough to live on the same block as one!”

we agreed on that one, too.

“actually, you couldn’t pay me enough to even live in a corner house around here, b/c, if you ask me, every single of ‘em is suspect,” i surmised, shaking my head.

the homes around here, some of them, like ours, for example, have gone thru so many transformations. and so, in my opinion, any corner house in the city could have been a bar at one point, or some other business–including a funeral home.

i mean, a guy did OD in our backyard, apparently, a couple years before we moved in. (our neighbor told us; story for the book, so you’ll have to wait on the gory details ) but he didn’t kick it in the house, you see. i mean, maybe someone kicked it in our house in it’s almost 110-year history. but at least there wasn’t a morgue downstairs. i mean, at least i don’t think there was. b/c we’re not a corner house. unless funeral homes aren’t always in corner houses… aw hell, now i’ve freaked myself out.

“maybe that’s why the house next door to us is so weird and big,” holly just chimed in.

geez, babe. thanks for that. as if the peeping tom shut-in across the street didn’t freak me out enough…

"I am the lemon zester of destruction!" aka The Glory of MST3K

Lets get one thing clear right off the bat: I am a nerd. A really really really huge nerd. I wear shirts that say things like “I like to think outside the quadrilateral parallelogram” and “nerds 2 squared ever” and “Wikipedia is Accurate. Citation Needed.” I have serious fangirl tendencies, as evidenced by the people I follow on twitter and the websites I frequent. As soon as they go on sale I will be purchasing my tickets to ComiCon 2010. I subscribe the the sxephil youtube channel. I have the entire Buffy the Vampire Slayer Series memorized.I could go on and on and on.

The point of this is, all of this nerdiness is nothing compared to the piece de resistance of my own personal geekdom: my complete obsession with MST3K. (Don’t ask me how I found out about MST3K. No, seriously, don’t ask me, because I will not tell you as you are not nearly as crazy as I am and you would not understand…) What is MST3K, might you ask? It is the brightest glory of this, our santa jesus lord. MST3K, shorthand for Mystery Science Theatre 3000, are a series of videos chronicling the sort-of imprisonment of Mike Nelson by what I would imagine Pinky and The Brain to look like if they were human. You see, human Pinky and Brain are evil scientists who send Mike into space, accompanied by his trusty sidekicks, Robots Tom Servo, Crow and Gypsy, and force them to watch horrible B movies made aproximately between the years of 1950 and 1975.

To cut the nerd for a moment: basically, they are videos of these three guys making really snarky and HILARIOUS commentary over these awful movies. Truly, it is one of the lights of my life, and I am proud to call myself a nerd if that means I am in the club of people who like these movies. There are websites where you can join MST3K meetups and go watch the vids with other devotees, and there is one in Arlington I am SERIOUSLY considering joining…

All and all, basically MST3K is just amazing. Like, really really fucking amazing. If any of you want to jump the “I am a normal person” ship and join the super geek tribe, I will welcome you with open arms and buckets full of Mystery Science Theatre to watch during your induction ceremony. Just say the word.

Until then, please watch the videos below and appreciate what I am talking about.

(ps- I tagged this as crack whore and lesbian, because I mean, why not give the people what they want? And by people, I mean the googles)

Friday, September 25, 2009

9 vieti traite

Sa spunem, ipotetic, ca ai putea sa traiesti noua vieti. Ca o pisica, sa zicem asa. Doar ca dupa fiecare moarte sa te poti reincarna in alt corp, in alta fiinta, cu alt IQ, cu alt caracter, alte principii. Sa stii si sa constientizezi ce ai fost in celelalte vieti, dar sa nu-ti poti controla faptale si actiunile din viata pe care o traiesti in prezent. Savvy?

Multa lumina in viata ta sau sa fii privat de liberul albitru sau sa nu-ti suferi corpul sau sa iti placa barbatii/femeile. Sau cum ar fi sa te trezesti intr-un calorifer? Sau un bec? Ce ti-ar trece prin fiare, respectiv, filament? Sau cum ar fi daca ai fi un spermatozoid si ai muri infipt stupid de brav intre doua bucati de faianta dintr-o baie de pe autostrada? Sau o picatura de benzina fra plumb? Sau sa fii tu, dar in alt corp? Sa fii singur, dar de fapt sa fii fara tine? Daca nu ati inteles nimic, mai bine va duceti sa-i trageti o puta trista amicei sau sa va mai spalati o data pe mana dreapta. Sau duceti-va sa va raniti sentimentele.

Deci, avand in vedere cele spuse mai sus, ce ai vrea sa fii in alea noua vieti?

1. In prima as vrea sa fiu neaparat femeie. Cu toate ciclurile si toate epilarile posibile, o sa am cele mai mari doua satisfactii de pe acest pamana impecabil: o sa am ţâţe! si o sa pot sa ma fut cu orice tip. V-am mai zis eu: daca as fi fost femeie, as fi fost cea mai mare curva.

2. As vrea sa trec si prin corpul unui caine. In primul rand pentru a vedea cum vede un caine ( alb-negru ) si in al doilea pentru a experimenta ce simte un caine cand ne jucam ca niste oameni expusi la Cernobal cu ei. Adica asemenea unor retardati. Ah, si as vrea sa musc toti manelistii de beregata.

3. Gay nu as vrea sa fiu, va las pe voi, in schimb as vrea sa fiu lesbiana. Sa nu va mai zic ca am avut un vis in care am fost lesbiana. Cel mai tare vis posibil. M-am trezit dimineata si puteam sparge caramini, beton armat si aur cu penisul meu viril.

4. As vrea sa fiu o perna. O perna proasta care e atat de tare incat in fiecare zi sa ai dureri de spate. De ce as vrea sa fac asta? Nu stiu, poate pentru ca sunt atat de bulangiu.

5. Nu cred ca mi-ar placea nici daca as fi un vibrator folosit in filmele porno. OoOps, ba mi-ar placea. Dar acum aia folosesc un vibrator pentru o tipa sau pentru mai multe tipe? Ce trist  ar fi daca as fi un vibrator folosit pentru filme gay. Nu e combinatie.

6. O oglinda a unei grase. Vreau sa ma umplu de energie pozitiva din imensa dezamagire a unei tipe care se bosumfla in fiecare zi pentru ca a slabit doar +400 grame. ( nu ma refer la femeile cu probleme, ci la cele care mananca grasime si slana pe maine cu soia  in loc de a respira )

7. Un sutien. Motivele sunt evidente, hac, parerea mea.

8. Un aparat foto pro. Cum eu sunt prea atehnic si prea inapt pentru a face o poza decenta, doar asa imi pot satisface mica pasiune pentru poze. Chiar imi plac pozele artistice.

9. Un site de filme porno. Doar pentru a ma putea bloca/claca in momentul in care cei vizavi de mine sunt gata sa le sara dopu’.

10. Un actor de filme indiene. Doar pentru a spune ca fac filme la BHollywood. ( Cu B mut )

Plec la tara. Yeeey. Promit sa dau o sapa si pentru voi. Scuzati eventualele greseli, dar e scris in graba.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Flogging, Biting and Fucking - A Weekend To Remember

My second trip to Denver was amazing. Master picked me up at the airport and we excitedly chatted on the way to his house. J called, and He took the phone from me and then told me to suck his cock while He talked to her and drove. After a while, He instructed me to stop and handed me the phone. i talked to J for a few more minutes before i hung up. We then discussed the evening’s plans. L’s birthday party was that night, and it was a surprise. And she had no idea that i was coming into town. We were both crazy with excitement.

He dropped me off at their house and instructed me to get everything ready for the party. He said that we did not have many people coming, so we would not need much food, and gave me the money to go to the store with. As soon as He left i headed to the store to buy snacks and decorations for the party.

The guests started arriving and one woman asked about the food. I did not have much out, as i was following Master’s orders, but we decided to add some to it. The party was lovely, and L was VERY happy to see me.

Once the party was over, me, Master and L sat around watching football. After a few minutes, He instructed me to go downstairs and take L and begin and He would join us shortly. i politely asked her if she would like to join me downstairs and she happily accepted. Within a few minutes i was eating her pussy eagerly. i heard Him come into the room but i couldn’t see Him. As i continued licking His wife with all of my might i heard him set out a few things. At one point i turned and looked and saw him sitting out a chair with straps attached to it. i knew that He was going to bind me to it.

Once He had everything set out, He instructed me to stop. I sat up and waited for Him to give me further instructions. He instructed her to turn over onto her stomach and she did. He then handed me a black leather glove covered in tiny silver spikes. i put it on my hand, as He instructed and waited. i watched as He pulled out a small instrument that looked like a little pinwheel of sharp needle-point spikes attached to a straight stick handle. He began rolling it all over her, and with each whisk of the pinwheel she gasped and shook. i wondered what it felt like, if it hurt and if so, how much. It was as if He read my mind because soon He whisked it down my arm. It was sharp and pointy, but more prickly than painful. He then silently instructed me to run the glove along her body spike side down. He simply waved His hand over her still torso and nodded. i did as He showed me, and we alternated with the glove and the pinwheel. He also had me spank her ass with the glove a couple of times, which made her jump and cry out each time. i shuddered and winced at the thought of causing her pain, even though i knew that she liked it. She was so delicate and sweet, it was hard for me to inflict pain onto her.

He then took back the glove and put it and the pinwheel away. i watched as He grabbed a new instrument, it was black and consisted of a handle that had many long black leather strips attached to it. He jiggled it over her back, letting the tips of the black leather strips tickle her. He then began to sweep it back and forth across her ass, stroking her with it harder and faster as He went. She moaned pleasurably and mumbled “Thank you” into the bed underneath her face. She then muttered, “Love that” and moaned some more. Every once in a while, He would stop stroking her with it and would jiggle it over various parts of her body again, which made her squeal and squirm.

He put the black instrument away and opened a large clear tupperware container filled with a clear gooey substance. He took a cotton swab and told me that i would be His official “blower” as he swooped the swab through the clear jelly-like substance. i had no idea what He meant, but i knew that He would guide me and i sat up nice and straight and awaited his instruction.

He took the swab of goo and ran it along her back, down her spine. He then took the swab and lit the end of it with a burning candle next to the bed. He then touched the flame quickly to the substance down her spine and it lit on fire, which he immediately blew out. i knew what my job was now, and i moved a little closer to fulfill my new duty.

He spread the goo on her shoulders, the small of her back, her thighs and her ass. Each time He lit her i would blow it out as quickly as i could. He then instructed her to turn over and he put a small heart shape of goo on her chest directly underneath her left breast. He lit it and i blew it out. He then made a line all the way down her chest and then across her lower stomach and lit it. The flame shot down her body and across her stomach to each hip simultaneously. She gasped and squirmed as we blew it out.

He then motioned for me to hold out my arm. i did, and he put a line of the good down my arm and then lit it and blew it out. It was like a flash of warmth, not necessarily hot and it surely did not burn. But it made my skin feel alert and alive.

He then motioned for me to come to Him and i stood up off the bed. He pointed to the chair and i promptly sat in it. He then grabbed my wrists and strapped them to each side, directly to the chair with large black straps. i smiled in excited anticipation as He then ran His hand along my right leg, yanking it in line with the leg of the chair and then strapping my ankle to it. He repeated the process with my left leg.

He then motioned for L to come to the end of the bed and she immediately obeyed. He told her that He was now going to fuck her and that the entire time He was fucking her that she was to look at me and tell me how He felt. He then told her to lay on her back with her head off the edge of the bed. i knew from experience that He was going to deep throat her. And He did. And i watched. He then got onto the bed and began to fuck her as hard as He could with her head hanging off the edge of the bed, with her looking directly at me. She was saying how amazing He felt and moaning really loud. Her bright eyes were staring up at me while i sat there, unable to do anything but watch her being pleasured by Him.

After a few minutes He grabbed a fistful of her hair and instructed her to cum, and within seconds she began to cum and wail loudly. i bit my lip as i watched her fully orgasm, staring at me the whole time. It was one of the hottest things i have ever witnessed.

He then got off of her and instructed her to lay on her back with her head on the pillows and she obeyed. He then came over, and slowly unstrapped my right leg, then my left, then each wrist. He told me to pick up where i had left off, but to be careful because she had just cum.

i eagerly climbed onto the bed, spread her legs wide and began licking her as firmly but gently as i could. She shot her hands above her head and grabbed the headboard and moaned happily. i heard the rustle of a condom behind me and felt Him climb onto the bed. As He mounted me i felt the tip of His hard cock push into my tight little ass. I tried hard not to clench, but my leg muscles instinctively tightened as He began to push into it.

i threw my head up and screamed in pain, tears immediately flowing freely down my face. She grabbed my head and whispered to me “Relaaaax,” and stroked my hair. He stopped and instructed me that if i needed Him to stop to say, “Red.”

i nodded and He began to push into me again. i began punching the bed next to her and screaming “GOD DAMMIT, FUCK!!!!!” He pushed further and further into my ass and i tried to resume licking her, but had to take breaks every few seconds to scream and yell curse words. He finally made it all the way into my ass and began thrusting harder and harder. By this time it felt good, and my screams became moans as i licked His wife hungrily. The taste of her sweet Krispy Kreme-like pussy in my mouth combined with His huge hard cock pounding into my ass sent me flying. i was in a truly happy place of pure ecstasy, and with every stroke and lick i got closer and closer to cumming. i felt my clit start to tingle along with the pit of my stomach and knew that i would be cumming soon. i took a break from eating her pussy to scream and enjoy my powerful orgasm. It shot down from my stomach to my clit and shot throughout my entire pelvis and groin. i poked my ass up a little bit further and He kept pounding on it, even harder now. i returned to my “job” and was determined to make her cum. She moaned and moaned, even harder and louder this time and i continued, concentrating on staying in the same spot and getting her there in a solid progressive climb.

After a few minutes she began to wail really loud and i knew that she was about to cum. He also started moaning really loud, and i concentrated even harder as she shook and wailed beneath me, and He rammed and moaned above me. After they both finished their orgasms, He withdrew from my ass and i fell onto her with a sigh of complete satisfaction and accomplishment. after we all gathered ourselves, He ordered me to come lay in between them and they surrounded me with arms and legs and kisses. i snuggled down deep in between them with a huge smile on my face. i had not felt that content and peaceful in a very long time.

The next day when we all woke up, Master and i went to the grocery store to get some things, since He had requested that i make breakfast for them on Sunday, just as i do for my kids each week. When we got home, L and i made breakfast. After we all ate, we discussed the plans for that evening. One of the online swingers sites was hosting a White Party, and He stated that He would be deciding later whether we were going to attend that or spend a quiet evening at home.

Lunchtime rolled around and He asked me if i would go with Him to get some sandwiches for lunch. We drove for about 15 minutes to this little tiny authentic Italian sandwich shop. On the way, we chatted about the weekend and what we were going to do. We had planned on getting the “Yes Sir” tattoo on my ass that day but the tattoo artist canceled on us. And He was going to purchase a new show collar to let me wear. This was my good girl reward for following His instructions the last month. i was extremely excited over this, and couldn’t wait!

At the Italian sandwich shop there were a couple of older family members working behind the counter, speaking in thick Italian accents and yelling orders to each other. Master and i got sandwiches, and then on the way home we stopped by one of His favorite motorcycle shops and took a look around.

When we got home, we all ate our sandwiches at the table while chatting about the rest of the evening. Master announced that He had decided that we were going to attend the White Party, but that He and L had to attend a family BBQ first. They left, and i laid down on the couch to take a much needed nap. After a good sleep, i woke up and began to get ready for the party. i had brought several white outfits, but one dress in particular i wanted to wear. It was short and buttoned all the way up the front with a scoop neck that showed off my tits and made them look nice and big. i knew that Master and L would love it, and i was very excited to wear it for them.

They came home and we all got dressed and headed out. But we made a very important stop first. i was receiving my good girl reward, which was that i was going to get to pick out any collar i wanted. It was going to be a new show collar, and i was beyond excited. i had been picturing the one that i wanted, and i knew that i wanted a red shiny one. We got to the Crypt, and He led me over to the showcase holding the selection of collars. They had all different colors and styles, and after trying several on, i narrowed it down to a red plaid one, a solid black one, and another solid black one with a small red patch on it. i wasn’t overly crazy about any of them, and was just about to decide on the plain black one when suddenly the sales lady remembered that one of the mannequins had the same exact one on except it was RED!!! She scurried over and got it down for me and L placed it around my neck. i immediately knew that this was the one. It was red and shiny, EXACTLY how i had pictured it! The only thing that i would have changed about it was that it didn’t lock, but the majority of the ones they had didn’t. But either way, i didn’t care. It was beautiful, and i gave Master a huge kiss and thanked Him for His pretty, new collar.

As we walked back to the car, i felt myself dripping down my leg from excitement. i did not have any panties on underneath my dress, and i laughed at how much i was dripping as L and i walked along the sidewalk holding hands. i was happy, beyond happy as i sat in the back seat of the car and gingerly fingered Master’s shiny leather collar sitting snugly around my neck. The whole way to the party i was giddy with excitement. L laughed at me, because i could not keep up with the conversation. All i could think about was how happy i was, and i was off somewhere on cloud 9, just me and His shiny red collar, dancing on the clouds, happy as could be.

We arrived at the party and Master put a leash on me. My heart jumped so hard it almost choked me. i had no idea why i loved that damn leash so much, but i did. We made our way through the crowd and within a few minutes He removed the leash. It was way too crowded to try and navigate with a leash. There were people everywhere! Master and L knew quite a bit of them, and we slowly made our rounds throughout the house.

After having conversations with several people there, we headed into the kitchen to sit, as L’s feet were beginning to hurt. After sitting and chatting a while, Master decided that we should go upstairs to see if anything interesting was going on. We made our way into one of the bedrooms and saw 2 couples fucking. One couple was on the bed and one couple was on a small sofa in the corner. About 10 or so people stood around the edge of the room watching. We wandered into the bathroom and peeked into an adjacent room but nothing much was going on in there. We went back into the first room and found a place to stand and watch the couples fuck.

After a few moments, Master put His arms around me from behind and began unbuttoning my dress. He slid my dress off of my shoulders and it fell to the floor, leaving me naked except for my bra and high heels. He then slid L’s dress up over her head and tossed it aside. He then grabbed her hair in His left fist and mine in His right, gently pushed down on our heads and stated firmly, “Down.” We both knew the command well, and fell to our knees and opened our mouths, ready to accept His cock when He presented it to us. We took turns sucking His large, hard cock, slathering our hot wet mouths all over it, and i heard Him moan as a couple of the other people watching made favorable comments.

After a few moments, He grabbed our hair again and lifted us back up into standing positions. He removed L’s bra, and then mine, and tossed them aside. He then firmly told L to go lay down on the floor, on her back, by the bed. She immediately obeyed. He then gestured towards her and told me to go lay on top of her, missionary style. i immediately got excited and practically leapt on top of her. i knew exactly what was going to happen, because she had explained this move they did to me before. He was going to fuck me, while i was laying on top of her, pinning her down. She would have to just watch and be turned on, without any ability to touch herself or pleasure herself in any way. It excited her greatly, and she looked at me and said “Guess what you get to be???”

i smacked the floor on both sides of her and replied “E**** sandwich!!!” and waited for Him to approach me.

He did just a few short moments later. i felt Him kneel behind me and soon i felt His hand reach down and rub my pussy. i wasn’t sure if He was going to enter my ass or my pussy, as we tend to have anal sex more than vaginal sex. Suddenly both of His hands spread apart my pussy and within moments His large, rock hard cock entered me. i immediately melted into L and moaned with pleasure. He felt so good inside of me and she felt so good beneath me. i was truly in a very happy place, and completely forgot about the people surrounding us, watching it all take place.

Master began thrusting into me harder and harder, and His very large cock was slamming into the bottom of my pussy. With each thrust i let out a scream, which made Him thrust even harder. Soon everything faded except the feel of Him behind me and the smell, sound and feel of her beneath me. She would occasionally brush back my hair and look at my face as i screamed louder and louder as he pounded me harder and deeper with each thrust. i suddenly felt my orgasm start, but before i even had a chance to focus on it, it shot through my entire body like a bolt of lightening. i came so hard that my vision blurred for a moment and i had to come back to reality and remember where i was for a split second when i opened my eyes. Once it was over, i looked over and the male part of a couple that we had been talking to earlier was kneeling in front of mine and L’s faces, presenting his large hard cock to us. i knew that He wanted one of us (or both of us) to suck it, but i was being fucked too hard to think about anything else. Besides, i knew that i had a very strict rule about not fucking anyone else without Master’s expressed permission, and since He was busy beating up my pussy it was not the best time to bring up the subject. Within a few moments, He began to cum, moaning very loudly and thrusting deep and hard in long, slow strokes.

He exited me and just as i got up He instructed L to get up onto the bed. The couple that had been on there was gone and He wanted to take it over. She got onto the bed and laid on her back with her head on the pillows and He suddenly grabbed the back of my hair and pushed my face into her pussy. i happily began rubbing her clit with my tongue in up and down, firm, fast strokes. She began to moan and i began swinging my legs behind me, as i always do when i am eating out a girl, and suddenly realized that i still had on my white high heels. i left them on, as leaving my heels on during sex makes me feel incredibly sexy.

Master came onto the bed and knelt next to L, watching us both. i ate her the best that i could, and could hear her getting close to cumming. Suddenly, a loud, drunk, obnoxious girl came into the room, shouting something to one of the bystanders. Someone asked her to be quiet, because people were having sex and she scoffed. L was back to moaning softly and i knew that she had lost all the progress that i had made. The girl behind us let out a couple more loud comments and then finally shut up. i began to focus even harder on getting my beautiful Mistress to cum in my mouth.

She slowly began her ascent again, and i focused as hard as i could on staying in the same spot and keeping the same rhythm in order to let her achieve orgasm. She began to shake and wail loudly and i knew she was cumming. As she came, Master came too, all over her chest. The people in the room watching clapped and cheered in appreciation. They knew that our progress had been broken, and how focused we were on getting her to cum. i was pleased that she had finally been satisfied, and stared at Master’s cum all over her chest. I began licking it off, every single drop of it, and she asked me if i was going to share. i leaned over and spit all of His cum into her mouth and she swallowed it. She looked up at Master and said, “She shared!” with a big smile.

i stood up off the bed and my knees buckled a little. The room was much more crowded than it had been before we started, and i recognized several faces from the crowd we had mingled with previously. i began to walk over towards our stuff against the wall when L suddenly grabbed me, hugging me tight. She whispered into my ear and told me that she was falling in love with me, and i told her that i was ok with that. She then asked me to please not break her heart and i promised that i wouldn’t. She brushed my hair back from my face and began kissing me. i kissed her back as passionately as possible and she took a few steps, pushing me towards the wall. Suddenly, Master grabbed me and slammed me into the wall, and grabbed both of my wrists, pinning them above my head. She knelt down and licked me and shoved her fingers into me and began moving them around. i moaned with pleasure as my knees went weak. My orgasm came really fast and really hard, the combination of His strength pinning me against the wall and her soft mouth on me and her fingers moving around in me made me melt into my powerful orgasm as i shook and came within mere minutes.

She rose back up to a standing position and He released His grip on my wrists. i bobbled a little bit and almost collapsed. She grabbed me and asked me if i was ok and i just smiled groggily and sighed saying, “Yesss….”

They both laughed as i let my body sink to the floor. i enjoyed my euphoria for a few moments before gathering myself enough to get re-dressed. After i was dressed, L and i sat up against the wall while Master chatted with a really attractive female, which happened to be the female counterpart of the guy who was presenting his cock to me and L while we were on the floor earlier.

i watched Master as He aggressively came on to the girl for a few minutes and then turned my attention to L. She asked if i had had fun and i said, “Very much so!” I then asked her how situations like this worked and she began explaining how hooking up at swinger parties worked. i stopped her and explained with a chuckle that i knew how that worked, but i meant how did the swinger party situation work with Him, gesturing to Master, who was now getting a blow job from the cute girl. i added, “You know, cause, i mean, i have to ask first, but for instance that guy wanted us to suck him but i didn’t because i had no idea how that works with Him.”

“Ohhhh!” she answered, and quickly explained that in situations like that consent is implied, but if He saw something that He didn’t like He would stop it. This eased my mind greatly. All i was concerned about was making sure that i did not make any mistakes or do anything to displease Master.

I looked over and Master now had the girl naked and bent over, and He was pulling a condom out of His pants. She was sucking away at her significant other’s cock as Master put the condom on. The man she was with pointed to me. i pointed to myself, asking if i was the one he was referring to and he nodded. He then made the “come here” motion and i stood up and walked over to him.

“Down,” he said firmly, and i nervously looked up at Master as i knelt down. He was watching, so i went ahead and opened my mouth and began sucking the man’s cock. He looked at his girl and said that I was fun to watch and i mumbled “thank you” with his cock still in my mouth. He grabbed my hair and started saying dirty things to me, telling me to suck him and calling me a dirty little slut. After a few minutes, he moved over to the bed and i knelt down on the floor in front of the bed and resumed sucking him. He was telling me to look at him, and asked me where i wanted him to cum. i said, “my face” and continued my task. i suddenly felt Master’s hand on my left arm and it flooded me with happiness. i quickly grabbed his hand in mine. It made me feel so good, knowing that He was right there next to me. The man i was sucking began to cum and suddenly pulled out and yanked my head back by my hair, cutting off my air supply and came all over my face. After he was done, he grabbed my face and turned it up to him and asked me if that was what i wanted. i nodded and he then spit onto my face. i recoiled in shock and just then Master stepped in and pulled the guy’s hands off of me and stated that we were still figuring out my boundaries. The guy apologized and i stood up and walked over to L. She asked me if i was ok and looked extremely worried. Right then, Master approached me and asked me the same thing. i stated that i was, but that i needed to wash my face. Master led me to the bathroom and watched as i ran hot water over a washcloth and wiped my face. He again asked me if i was ok and i stated that i was, although the spitting thing was a little much. He assured me that i always had the right to say no, and again asked me if i was sure that i was ok. i smiled at Him and said that i was fine and we went back out into the bedroom. The guy and his girl were standing there with L looking concerned, and Master walked up to him and said that we were all good. The guy reiterated his apology and asked if we were all good for reassurance. Master again said that we were all good and shook the guy’s hand. We then gathered our things and said our goodbyes and left the party.

Master instructed me and L to wait on the curb while He went to get the car. While we waited we discussed the guy spitting on my face. She explained that his girl was really into raunchy degradation play. This explained a lot. i told her that i didn’t even know that guy was a Dom until he said, “Down.” We both laughed about how naturally we react to that command. Knees bend and mouth opens, automatically. i went on to explain that the whole spitting thing was kinda weird, but that i would have probably not been so taken back by it had it been with Master.

In the car on the way home, Master, L and i all discussed degradation play and limits. L told a story about her limits and how she unfortunately had to find them the hard way. When we got home, L went to bed, and Master asked me if i would watch a movie with Him. We snuggled up on the couch to watch “Choke,” a movie about a sex addict. As we watched we discussed the night’s events and the situation with the other Dom. He stated that the whole reason for me not playing with any other Doms without Him being present was for my own protection. He stated that He saw me as this beautiful little flower that was just beginning to bloom, and He didn’t want anybody coming along and crushing His beautiful bloom. i agreed, and He gave me a long, sweet kiss. I curled into the crook of His arm, happy and safe. i liked the feeling. i hadn’t felt “safe” with anyone in a very long time. But for some reason, He made me feel more free yet more protected than i had ever felt before. It was so odd, yet despite my inability to understand it, i enjoyed it, regardless of my intense fear of letting go like that.

Soon He began playing with my tits, and removed my shirt. He did not like for my tits to be covered up, and the majority of the time i was topless. He ran His hand down into my pajama pants and began playing with my pussy. He pulled down my pajama pants and my heart started beating so hard i thought surely He could hear it. He wanted to fuck my ass, and began playing with it and pressing His cock into my ass. i winced in pain, as i was still very sore from the previous night. He knew that i was very sore, and explained to me that i could humbly ask for Him to spare my ass.

“Sir, may i humbly request that you please spare my ass?” i said timidly. He agreed, and we snuggled back into each other and finished the movie.

The next day i made my Master and Mistress breakfast. Master had requested that i cook for Him in the nude, but i was so busy trying to get everything together that i forgot. He walked into the room, on the phone with J, and stated that He had lied, i wasn’t naked. L looked at me and tisked me for being naughty. i had my clothes off within seconds, and i went back to cooking, hoping that He would not spank me for my absent-mindedness. He walked into the kitchen and came up behind me and my heart raced. But He did not spank me, He simply handed me the phone. i talked to J for a little while and then continued making their breakfast. He instructed L to come over to me and they both stood behind me as He instructed me to stand still. I stood as still as i can while they each bit one of my ass cheeks. He bit significantly harder than she did, and when they let go, they marveled at their handywork. He snapped a picture with His phone and showed it to me. There was a nice sized bite mark on my ass. i loved it!

That afternoon, He took me riding on his motorcycle. i was much less nervous this time than the first time. We rode with a friend of His through the mountains and stopped to see Buffalo Bill’s grave. It was beautiful, and on the way back His friend decided to head home, so we split off. As we winded through the mountains we discussed motorcycles and the signals riders use with each other, him and L, and my ass and its recovery process. He stated that He fully intended to fuck my ass when we got home, and that there wasn’t anything that i could do about it. my stomach flip flopped with nervousness and excitement.

We got home and He immediately took me downstairs to fuck me. He ordered me to get undressed and lay on the bed and He crawled on top of me. We began kissing and i mustered up the nerve to ask Him something that i had been wanting to ask for days now.

“Sir?”

“Yes?” He asked, stopping to look down at me.

“Um, you know that bite mark you gave me earlier today?” i asked, averting my eyes from His.

“Yes…” He stated, waiting for me to finish.

“Um, well….,” i hesitated, “i’d like a lot more of those, please.”

Without a word He began biting me really hard all over my body. i squealed in delight and squirmed underneath his mouth chomping down on my alert flesh. i instinctively shot my hands above my head and grabbed the tender skin next to my armpit in my teeth and chomped down on it. It was already sore. i pulled my arm back and took a look at it. There was a nice sized, dark bruise already there. It was from me biting myself during the sex we had had the previous 2 nights. i chuckled and showed Him the bruise and stated that now i knew what it was from and that i had done it to myself and bit down on it again as He continued. After giving me several sizable and rough bites, He suddenly stopped and grabbed my legs and yanked me downward. He shoved His large cock into my pussy and began fucking me harder than i have ever been fucked before. It was amazing. i had never had a guy pound on me that hard and that fast. He changed positions on me a couple of times, and i squirted as i came. When He stopped, He rolled over, out of breath and stated that He needed to catch His breath. i was fine with that, i had just been fucked silly and was enjoying the throbbing all over my body from His cock slamming into my pussy and the bites He had given me.

After a few moments, He got up off of the bed and put on a new condom. He laid two pillows on the center of the bed, on top of each other and suddenly grabbed my ankles and spun me, landing me right on top of the pillows. i knew what He was doing. He was getting ready to fuck my ass and wanted my ass in the air for leverage. i laid there in extreme fear and anticipation as i felt Him kneel on the bed behind me. He mounted me and found my ass with the tip of His cock and began pressing it into me. His cock suddenly broke through and pain seared through my entire ass, radiating out into my stomach and legs. i screamed into the comforter and He laid prone on top of me and bit a huge chunk of my skin on my right shoulder. Suddenly the pain in my ass was bearable, as the pain in my shoulder counter-balanced it. He began fucking my ass in long determined strokes as i whimpered and cried beneath His bite and thrusts. i kept expecting Him to let go of the chunk of skin between His teeth, but He kept biting harder and harder and didn’t let go. This brought an orgasm on almost instantly. My entire body was tingling and quivering as my pussy, every part of it, vagina, clit, and even the sides near the legs, EXPLODED. i had not felt an orgasm that intense in years, if ever. He came almost immediately after i did and rolled over beside me, spent. i laid there, panting and shaking from the powerful orgasm i had just experienced. i rolled over onto my back and immediately winced at the sharp pain in my right shoulder. The waves of throbbing radiated from the place of the bite throughout my entire shoulder, neck and back. It was soothing and sensual, and i love it immensely. i had always loved being bitten, but i had never found anyone that would bite me hard enough to make it count. As i laid there, satisfied beyond compare, i told Him about all of the things i was thinking.

He told me to pack up my things and i did as He suddenly instructed me to sit in the chair that He had strapped me to Friday night. i did as He instructed and he bound my arms and legs to the chair, just as before. He then put nipple clamps on me, and began flicking my nipples really hard with his fingers. The sensation was amazing, and i moaned and jerked with each flick. He then picked up the black leather instrument He had used on L on Friday with all the leather strips and began whipping it across my clamped nipples. It felt absolutely wonderful. With each whisk of the leather across my nipples i gasped and moaned and jerked my body. And with every jerk of my body, the edge of the chair hit against the bite mark on my shoulder, causing it to send throbbing waves throughout my neck, shoulder and upper back. i was in heaven. It was all so relaxing and sensual….i did not want Him to stop. He did though, eventually, and unstrapped me from the chair, un-clamped my nipples, and instructed me to go over and put my hands on the wall.

i did as i was told and He began whipping the strips across my back. Again, it felt amazing, and i loved it. Every once in a while, He would purposely whip it against the bite and the waves and ripples would start again.

He then stopped and i heard Him rustling around. i dropped my hands and He then came back up behind me and said, “I don’t remember telling you that you could move your hands,” to which i immediately replaced them on the wall. He then began running what i recognized by the feel of it as the pinwheel thing across my back. It hurt a little, more than it did on my arm, due to my back being so sensitive from the whipping of the black leather strips on my back and bite. But it wasn’t a bad pain. It was more like an intense pain, but not one that i wanted to escape from necessarily.

After He was finished, He told me that i could move away from the wall and i went to sit back in the chair. He sat on the bed in front of me and asked me what i thought of all the things He had just done to me. i pointed to the black leather thing with the strips and said, “That thing feels GOOD. What’s it called?”

He picked it up and began running the strips through his fist and said that it was called a flogger. i immediately knew that it was going to be one of my favorite toys.

L came home, admired His handywork and then we said our goodbyes. As i drove to the airport L and i discussed the weekend and how great it was. i was sad to be leaving. i wanted to stay, i wanted to soak up even more of them, i wanted to wake up tomorrow with them next to me. As i sat at the airport bar drinking a beer and eating a snack, a couple of people commented on my bite mark. It made me smile, and every once in a while i would reach up and touch it and the ripples would start again…

xoxoxo
sunshine

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Scotland Yard: a queen fit for the Queen

Photo from Google Images.

MedIndia.net is reporting that the Scotland police are searching for a more diverse workforce, explicitly requesting that gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people apply to guard the Queen at Windsor Castle and Balmoral.

Scotland Yard wrote in a notice for the open positions, “Applications are particularly  welcomed from women, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and black and minority ethnic communities/people as these are under-represented within SO14 [Royalty Protection Branch].”

But, of course, according to the same notice, “Selection will be based solely upon merit.”

Train to Monsterville

I found myself stuck yesterday and even this morning, stuck in my head.  And this hasn’t happened for awhile, I got sucked into some internal dialogue/argument/resolution that hadn’t even happened yet, and did not happen at all.  Its interesting, kind of like my brain is all pissed off that Im not living there and wants to take me on a trip somewhere, well I hopped on the train and went for a 36 hour ride, what a waste BUT a learning experience, when I realized what I was doing (at about half way through shampoo stage) I let that dialogue drop away, and thats the best way I can put it,  I simply dropped it, I thought, what is so bad about this moment that I need to create somewhere else to be…nothing, hot shower, coconut conditioner, life is good…Im staying here, sorry brain (and dont expect me to use you at work either!).

Tai Chi class was last night, the class is small (which I like) the instructor takes the time to watch your movements and adjust them and show you why you are moving the way you are..meaning that tai chi, as we are being taught although is a martial art is tough to envision why you move certain ways without being in a fight, so the instructor explains that you move your hands a certain way to block, then move another way to deflect, step away etc..its easier to understand the movements when you know what they were created for.  I also learned that he teaches as the local yoga studio in our town…sweet.

 Its going to be another wonderful day here in Boston AND it is the first full day of fall…yay

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

a masturbation story

I like to take really hot showers and get out with my skin still all pink heated. I go in my room and lay across my bed on my back and feel the fan blowing cool air against my moist skin. I feel the goose bumps start to form as the water dries. It is my favorite time to masturbate. I lay there exploring my breasts with my hands, gently pulling at my nipples until they are both rock hard and then pinching them just until they hurt. That spark of pain loosens the juices and I feel my pussy moisten and start to tingle. Spreading my legs to let the cool air from the fan meet the wet heat from between my thighs, I feel a sigh escape my lips as my hands begin to reach for the soft folds of flesh. As my fingers pull my pussy lips apart and begin a slow exploration of the wetness within I am thrilled with how wet, how heated I can make myself. I close my eyes and feel the tension begin to build as my fingers find the familiar tender places and begin to tickle and tease, spreading the wetness around and slipping into the heated depths. Behind my eyes runs a porn quality fantasy of my best friend and that crazy druken night we spent licking each other from head to toe in college. I can smell her hair and taste the sweet liquor flavored kisses of her mouth. I feel her nails run down my belly and it’s her hands making me moan. I see her tits in my face as she leans over me up on all fours inviting the dark stranger we picked up in the bar to have his way with her. I hear him moan and feel his body shudder as he buries his cock in her and begins to pound her from behind. her titties bounce in my face, he has a handful of her hair pulling her head back as the extacy escapes her lips on a sigh. I reach with my mouth and pull her nipple with my teeth, suckling on it – feeling it harden. A tear escapes her as I bite hard enough to hurt. The man encourages me as the pain made her wetter. Using my fingers I pull on the other nipple until she cries out. After another forceful pinch, I use my mouth to gently lick the nipples – holding her big beautiful breasts in my hands and she sighs with the softness that followed the pain. I hear him spank her and she cries out again. He uses the paddle we bought and spanks her other cheek. She moans, she giggles and she loses her next words into my kiss. The man continues to spank her until both her cheeks are pink and warm to the touch. gently he uses his hands to softly rub the same area he just used the paddle on. Pulling out of her, he brings his mouth to her ass and uses his tongue to apply soft kisses to the pain, pulling her ass up to his face he buries his face in her pussy and licks her until she cums. He has the small cat of ninetails whip in his hands and her eyes have gone big at the site of it. I feel my pussy tingle in anticiaption of the leather meeting the soft lips of her pussy. I watch as he spanks the soft feminine folds and see her eyes close with pleasure of it. He whips her pussy several times, softly licking her between each slap. Hearing her alternate cries from the pain and soft sighs from the pleasure of his mouth it is all I can do not to cum on the spot. Finally he turns her back over and pulls her ass towards him, she begs him to be gentle. He isn’t. He slams his huge, hard cock deep inside her swollen pussy sending tears down her face as a scream escapes her lips. He pushes her head into my pussy and she obediantly begins to feed on me. She is very good at it. Loves the taste of me on her tongue and soon he falls into a rthym from behind and between her moans she licks my swollen clit, alternating between a soft teasing lick and forceful one until I think there is no way I can stand it. She reaches back and finds my favorite dildo – 10 inches long and fat around. She looks devilishly at me and without a word shoves the entire 10″ in and begins to fuck me with the dildo. I can still feel her toung on my clit and the rythm of penetration is set by the stranger as he buries himself in her, banging hard from behind. I feel the climax building as she is screaming both our names and the dildo that has replaced her fingers slams into my pussy – arching my back, feeling her hair on my belly and thier moans, sounds of extacy in my ears feeling the fat dildo fill my pussy as the juices flow out of me, I feel myself cum, shuddering, shaking every muscle in my body tensed and the climax releases me and I cry out. Slowly I continue to carress the swollen clit and lips as my fantasy begins to shut down and reality floats back on the soft billow of the fan blowing on me. Smiling I bring my fingers to my lips and lick each one, tasting pussy….

Bianca Pitzorno : Giuni Russo. Da un’estate al mare al Carmelo / Bompiani 2009. Camilla Valletti: Recensione

Bianca Pitzorno
Giuni Russo. Da un’estate al mare al Carmelo.
Con la collaborazione di Maria Antonietta Sisini
Con una nota di Franco Battiato
Bompiani – Grandi AsSaggi, Milano 2009
282 p. ; 23 €

Recensione inedita di Camilla Valletti per FNL (grazie Camilla)

Non bella, segnata da una educata goffaggine, di poverissime origini, Giuni Russo, prima Giusy Romeo e poi Junie Russo, come la vollero i suoi discografici, è morta pochi anni fa, ma sembra già essere entrata nella galleria di quei personaggi che hanno saputo mescolare le scelte di vita a quelle artistiche, fino a diventare, non solo in Italia, esempio principe di un certo gusto estremo, sentimentale e trasgressivo, autoironico e appassionato, persistente nel tempo, fondativo di una cultura musicale composta di alto/basso oggi molto esplorata.

Di lei, oltre alla voce improntata alla lirica venata da inflessioni sarde, insularità portata con orgoglio, si ricordano soprattutto i tagli dei vestiti squadrati, militareschi dalla spalle larghe che si chiudevano con un giro vita strettissimo, disegnati per lei da Versace e diventati tipici di una moda molto “vestita” anni ottanta.
Di lei, si ricorda anche la collaborazione con Franco Battiato e i testi di certe canzoni che hanno accolto, suscitando allora sgomento, nel grande baraccone sanremese, voci di prostitute stufe di battere lungo le strade destinate alle vacanze altrui.

Di lei, racconta la storia, purtroppo con un velo apologetico, Bianca Pitzorno, nota scrittrice di libri per ragazzi, amica di Giuni Russo e della sua compagna Maria Antonietta Sisini (che ha collaborato al volume).

Sull’omosessualità della cantante, peraltro da lei mai nascosta, Bianca Pitzorno preferisce tacere, in quanto, come lei stessa dichiara nella prefazione, è solo della nascita del suo talento e della sua vocazione che intende scrivere.
Ma come schivare il problema? Come sgusciar via da una collocazione che con tanta evidenza ha improntato la musica e lo stile di questa cantante? Tentando, con pochi documenti e molte digressioni, di alzare il livello di una vita fatta di autonomia, volontà, coraggio, determinazione.

Dalla prima vittoria a Castrocaro, cui seguirono i difficili rapporti con gli agenti e il sistema commercial-mediatico di allora, le apparizioni in discoteca, i padrini eccellenti come Albano e Romina, Celentano e Amanda Lear, fino al successo di Un’estate al mare e Mediterranea, l’autobiografia chiosa i momenti della vita della cantante senza mai menzionare cedimenti, descrivendo l’unione con Maria Antonietta Sisini come sempre lineare, serena, anche nell’agonia della morte dovuta a un cancro.

Il libro è comunque una buona occasione per rievocare la figura di Giuni Russo (molto interessante, anche da un punto di vista della storia del costume, l’apparato iconografico) e per ascoltare in una versione pulita le sue ultime canzoni ispirate alle grandi mistiche e alla tradizione sufi grazie al cd allegato.

Camilla Valletti

Qui trovate le info riguardo al CD e al DVD allegati

Riassunto bibliografico:
queer / letteratura italiana / prime edizioni
Giuni Russo. Da Un’estate al mare al Carmelo / Bianca Pitzorno
1. ed. – Milano : Bompiani. – 282 p. : ill. b/n ; 20,5 x 15 cm. – (Grandi AsSaggi)
Brossura, con sovracoperta: in cofanetto editoriale, con CD e DVD, in custodia.
Sisini, Maria Antonietta (nota di) ; Battiato, Franco (nota di)
Alla copertina: ritratto fotog. b/n di Giuni Russo, opera di Marco Giberti
©2009 RCS Libri S.p.A., Milano

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Monday, September 21, 2009

Farewell to summer

It may technically still be summer until Tuesday, but as my brilliant writer friend Frankie pointed out, with the way the weather is going it might as well be fall. There’s been a chill in the air, the sun is setting earlier, and I’ve been listening to Kay Hanley’s “Fall” on repeat.

That’s fine with me. Autumn is my favorite season, with its brisk air, colorful trees and of course Halloween. (And Kay Hanley is one of my favorite artists.) But perhaps prompted in part by yesterday’s gorgeous weather, I feel like summer deserves a last hurrah, so I thought I’d give a summary of our wonderful vacation in New England.

Most of our time was spent in or around my old college roommate’s apartment in Cambridge, Mass., which just might be my favorite city. There’s so much life in the downtown without all the hectic rushing of New York, and maybe it’s just the vacation buzz, but the people certainly seem more pleasant. Instead of a Starbucks every 10 feet, you find tea shops. (For someone like me who loves tea and hates coffee, that’s a welcome change.) And since I refuse to drive in either city, the traffic really only bothers my boyfriend.

But more importantly, at least for this blog, I’ve also found that we don’t feel strangers’ eyes on us all the time. In fact, as I noted in a post last year when we went on a very similar vacation, people also don’t really give us a second look, a fact my subconscious defenses notice and welcome.

If I thought Cambridge was accepting, you can imagine how welcome I felt when we went for a two-night stay in Provincetown, certainly the mostly famously fabulous town on the East Coast and easily the gayest place either of us has ever been. The main commercial strip can’t be much more than a mile or two, but I don’t think I’ve seen so many LGBT people together since we last went to New York’s Pridefest. It was so freeing to be in a community where we didn’t have to worry about anti-gay discrimination that even persistent rain couldn’t get us down.

Taken from the balcony of our room at the Provincetown Inn

Our hotel, the Provincetown Inn, was located at the very tip of the cape, and as you can see we had a room that offered a great view of the beach. Along with browsing the outrageously priced clothing shops, we had truly amazing dinners. The first was at the absolutely delicious Karoo Kafé, where I had some mind-blowing vegetarian Capetown Stew and my boyfriend had fish so fresh even I, the supreme seafood hater, liked it. Our second supper was more upscale and also quite good, the cozy and costly Edwige, where we ran into someone who came from right near my boyfriend’s hometown.

While there were scores of other young men with what I understood to be less than chaste intentions, the two of us acted a lot more like the older straight couples who apparently (and somewhat bewilderingly) decided a gay resort town was the best place to bring their kids. More power to ‘em, I say!

We resorted to the camera phone for this one

For instance, instead of staying up late partying, we got up early to go whale watching. That was fine with me, since we were treated to not one but two whales deciding to surface right next to our boat while a piratesque long ship floated just on the other side of them. Naturally, my camera battery died minutes before, but while none of my photos really do it justice, it was a great experience.

We also went to see the inimitable Maggie Cassella, a comedian who had us in stitches throughout her entire show. We had actually bumped into her in the street earlier in the day, when she asked us what we had planned for the night. When we told her we hadn’t thought that far ahead, she handed us a flyer and guaranteed us an entertaining night, and boy was she right! She immediately recognized us and referred to us frequently, calling us—the only male-male couple there that night—”(her) boys.” In proof of our everlasting bond, we are now friends on Facebook.

So while I’m still eagerly anticipating going apple-picking, drinking fresh spiced cider, and wrapping up in a warm blanket, please don’t think me anti-summer. It was full of time spent having a ball, with strangers telling us we were sweet instead of sick. I may have been too busy to post about it all until now, but they’re memories I’ll need come winter!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

“Rage: A Love Story”

I have a love-hate relationship with Julie Anne Peters’ books. On the one hand, they’re mostly easy reads, the stories move fast, and they’ve got that sort of trashy novel romance element to them. But on the other hand, the narrative is often clunky, she has very little flair for sublety, and she tends to write about issues more than characters. Keeping You a Secret was a Coming Out Novel; Far From Xanadu was about Unrequited Love with a little bit of Gender Identity; her latest, Rage: A Love Story is about Domestic Violence Among Teenage Lesbians. In it, goody two shoes Johanna, who volunteers at a hospice and tutors a disabled student falls for Reeve, who is from the wrong side of the tracks and has the scars to prove it. Their relationship quickly escalates into an all encompassing and abusive love affair – I’ll let you guess which one of them is the abuser. Everything is going fine, and poor Johanna doesn’t realize how far she’s falling until it all comes crashing down on her in a splashy denouement (another one of Peters’ trademarks). Meanwhile, Johanna’s sister, charged with taking care of her after both of their parents died, is having miscarriage after miscarriage; and her best friend, Novak is doing some self discovering of her own.

There are a lot of good things about this book. For one thing, despite the inherent annoyingness of Issue Novels, this is an issue that’s not covered very much in teen lit, and I suspect it’s something that happens much more often than we think. It was interesting to get inside the characters’ heads and psyches, and enlightening to see how one becomes involved in such a relationship. For teens who are just discovering love, sex and all things related to it, having stories like this around may broaden their perspective on the different kinds of love. Peters clearly did her research, and I consistently believed and understood why Johanna would get herself involved with Reeve. Additionally, the story moves quickly, and the sexual tension between Johanna and Reeve is palpable and just detailed enough to be believable and relatable, even to straight readers. She doesn’t describe the attraction between the two girls as some sort of strange fire (TM Indigo Girls) or as a foreign concept. The sexual attraction between these two is described with the same easiness that’s usually reserved for the hetero teen couples, and that’s something we don’t see a lot in queer lit either. It was a refreshing departure from the coming out stories that litter so much of the genre.

However, there were a lot of really irritating things about this book, too, and most of them are the same things that irritate me about Peters’ other books as well. Sublety is not Peters’ strong suit, and it shows. The narrative very often takes a way too didactic tone, reading more like an episode of the original Degrassi Junior High than an actual story. Within the first 20 pages of the book, we pretty much know everything we need to know about Reeve’s family and home life, so we know immediately who the abuser is and exactly why she does what she does. Hers is a textbook case of an abusive personality, and we know that right from the beginning. This makes the rest of it kind of boring, and the splashy denouement not so splashy, since we pretty much figured it out way in the beginning. Speaking of the ending… I don’t want to give away too much (though Peters does that for you, so not to worry), but the ending reeked of the same problem I’ve found with all of her books: too many things come crashing down at once, and there are way too many problems given to one character. Johanna lives in an apartment above the garage, because she was recently orphaned when her mom passed away from cancer, not long after her dad died from some other disease. Her slightly homophobic sister and brother in law have moved back to her parents’ house to take care of her and deal with their multiple failed attempts at having a baby. Reeve has an autistic brother, a drug addict mother, an absentee father who molested her, and a currently abusive stepfather. I get Peters’ point that not all high school kids are suburban white kids. But it doesn’t quite ring true for me that Johanna would have two dead parents, be dealing with coming out to her sister, have to live on her own, and also be stuck in an abusive relationship. The subplots and too-much-backstory tend to take away from the main narrative and get kind of exhausting, which is why it ultimately feels like you’re reading a book about an issue, as opposed to a story about a character.

The domestic violence premise of the book would make a good hook for a booktalk, as would the queer slant. I might describe or read aloud some of the passages of the violence inflicted on Johanna, for shock value.

Peters, Julie Anne (2009). Rage: A Love Story. New York: Random House. 291 pages.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Jessica Simpsons new fall shoe line....hot hot HOT

Is anyone else here a huge fan of Jessica Simpsons shoes?? If you’ve never worn a pair I would advise you to run out to your local Macys, credit card in hand, and do so! Not only are her show comfortable but they are VERY appealing to the eye. Not to mention reasonably priced. Start your fall fashion off right and make sure you check out J. Simpsons shoe line.

Link to her site :http://www.jessicasimpsoncollection.com/

Competition is Nasty Business

Americas Got Talent is the name of a show my girlfriend and I watch, and I really cant watch shows like this because I pick someone I want to win and when they dont I get really cranky…although i know my pick would not win I still went with her and it was this amazing singer Barbara Padilla

I think she will end up having a brilliant career, now about the man she lost to

Heres the thing, I knew Kevin Skinner would win and it had NOTHING to do with his singing abilities (or lack thereof) America wanted to change someones life, America went for the crying chicken guy from Kentucky who was without a job who wanted to do better for his family…well done chicken guy…nicely played..why go for the middle income stable family, job having, masters degree carrying cancer survivor.. who could sing you bloody…Americans had a chance to feel like someones hero and thats what they did, I am glad for him and his family but lets be honest, it was a talent show and Kevin Skinner would have been sent packing if the show was judged on talent alone.

 

Have a lovely Friday

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Bob

When I got hom from work the other night, Bob was sitting on the front porch

 

                                                  

I was thrilled and had a wonderful workout with him and the rest of my emerging kettlebell family…today Im a little sore, and tonight is the big workout with the hour cardio and the hour class, tomorrow I should be wrecked…nice

So Myrtle (man/turtle guy) has been coming in every morning munching on a dunkin donuts breakfast sammie

honestly, I dont say anything to him…he thinks he’s in  good shape, he told me so himself for a guy ‘his age’ I thought when people said stuff like ‘for a guy my age’ they mean something like 50 or 60, this guy is in his mid 30s.  I’ve come to find out that hes already suffered a mild heart attack and is on anti anxiety medication… what a dangerous combination of facts this is for me to have.  Well I thought it was going to be fun until i met his daughter, Myrtle came walking in with her one morning because she was sick and his ex wife was going to pick her up and take her to the Dr.  Thanks for bringing you ill kid into work you crotch bonnet….so even though I would love to be there when Myrtle takes a bite of his sammie, grabs his chest and drops to the floor, I will not poke him until he does that…his daughter needs him, I suppose, at least for his paycheck.

Madge…what are you doing?

A late apology: What’s wrong with being gay?

Thousands of people signed to call for a posthumous government apology to the computer pioneer, Alan Turing, for the unfair treatment he received for being gay fifty-seven years after his death. Alan Turing was most famous for his code-breaking work at Bletchley Park during WWII, helping to create the Bombe that cracked messages enciphered with the German Enigma machines. However, after his coming out of closet as a gay in 1952, Turing was prosecuted for gross indecency. Even worse, he was given experimental chemical castration as a “treatment” and his security privileges were removed, which led to his unemployment. As a result of this “appalling” treatment, Turing killed himself two years later.

Although sexual prejudice remains widespread in the world, attitudes toward lesbians and gay men have become somewhat more accepting in recent years. At the same time, a growing body of sociological and psychological studies deal with the attitudes of heterosexuals toward homosexual behavior. Studies show that one important determinant of attitudes toward lesbians and gay men has been identified in personality variables such as authoritarianism, religiosity, and sex stereotypes. A further important factor is the national or cultural context as shown by the results of international surveys. For example, based on an international survey about attitudes toward homosexuality, the highest tolerance score was found for The Netherlands and the lowest for the Philippines and Chile (Kelley, 2001). Furthermore, psychological research also show that media has significant influence on people’s attitude toward gay and lesbians (Levian et al, 2006).

While more and more people believe homosexuality is an acceptable lifestyle, some still violently object. The struggle for homosexual people to obtain visibility and representation in society is perhaps best embodied in the slogan that was popularized by the Queer Nation group in the 1990s, “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it”.

PM apology after Turing petition (BBC NEWS)

 

Levina, M, Waldo, C.R., & Fitzgerald, L. F. (2006). The Effects of Visual Media on Heterosexuals’ Attitudes Toward Gay Men and Lesbians.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Giuni Russo. Da un’estate al mare al Carmelo / Bianca Pitzorno. Bompiani 2009. (segnalazione)

E’ in libreria

Bianca Pitzorno / Giuni Russo. Da Un’estate al mare al Carmelo

Bompiani – Grandi AsSaggi, Milano 2009

Cofanetto con libro, 1 cd, 1 dvd

282 p., ill. fotog. b/n ; 23 €

Il libro è una biografia scritta da Bianca Pitzorno, “con la collaborazione di Maria Antonietta Sisini”, fidanzata da sempre di Giuni Russo, e presenta una brevissima nota di Franco Battiato in capo al testo, molte fotografie in bianco e nero, e, in coda al testo, una nota di Michele Fedrigotti, una Discografia, e i crediti de La sua figura, “docufilm” di Franco Battiato e del CD Giuni Russo, allegati al volume.

Canzoni contenute nel CD (”tracce di demo originali”):

Morirò d’amore (Giuni Russo / M. A. Sisini)

La sua voce (Come sei bella) (Giuni Russo)

Moro perché non moro (Giuni Russo / M. A. Sisini)

La sua figura (Giuni Russo / M. A. Sisini)

La sposa (Giuni Russo / M. A. Sisini)

Pekino (Giuni Russo)

Nei prossimi giorni su FNL una recensione inedita di Camilla Valletti.

Nel frattempo:

Morirò d’amore, Sanremo 2003

Su federiconovaro.eu trovate i link a tutti gli articoli comparsi sul blog, ordinati per categorie e ordine alfabetico.

the L word

you know, its always a turn on for straight guys to see two hot girls making out.

as in, 2 STRAIGHT girls kissing!!!…

click on the pic ( above ) to see xiaxue kissing an FHM babe, kay kay…

i’ve seen a couple of my straight girl friends kissing, tongue with one another…

no big deal.

but,

do straight girls find straight guys kissing each other as a turn on?!?!?…

or a major turn off?…

i did ask a few of my female friends,

and they said,

they don’t really get high or excited,

but they don’t get turn off…

really?…

but, so far, i’ve never see two straight guys kissing and swaping their tongues before.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The New England Patriots...yuckie

Living in Massachusetts and cheering against the patriots is a tough task, but I do it.  Last night it was easy to route against the patriots  largely because I am a Buffalo Bill fan AND we were in the comfort of our living room far away from the maddening salivating pats fans, although there was a football party going on in the neighborhood, and while falling asleep we could tell by the cheers that tommy boy had woken up and was bringing the patriots towards victory.  And so the football season begins, which is just the shoulder season for ice hockey anyway.

Why is it everytime I turn on the news that horses ass bo is making some kind of speech?  Yesterday he gave a speech on the anniversary of the leman brothers collapse…is he freaking kidding, why didnt he give a speech on what Kanye west did to taylor swift  at the VMAs that seemed like it was important enough for him to call a press conference.  I think bo is a dillweed but I dont trust him I think hes the Manchurian Candidate, bought and paid for by an enemy of the US or some consortium with there own evil agenda…do you think the Bushs paid for his education, I think they are a consortium with there own evil agenda…

More importantly I am awaiting the delivery of my new Kettlebell, I couldnt resist 45lbs…I wanted to get it today so I can work out with it before heading to Tai Chi class.  I found this ad and thought it was seriously gross, meat cliffs..so would that be rocks of fat blobs and a river of slurry running between the meat cliffs…the meat industry is trying to make meat equal tranquility…I’m sure tranquility is not what that animal experienced before becoming an advertisement for the industry that killed it..

You know, I was going to post the vma performance of lady gaga, but I think it was kind of crappy..and Im too lazy to try and find a decent song..and Im running late anyway..have a lovely toosday

Family info

If living a homosexual lifestyle is wrong and against what God calls us to then it is a good thing I got married before my desires fully awoke in me.  Because honestly right now where I am with my feelings and thoughts and such, I don’t think I would go after a guy or go out with a guy that had an interest in me.  And as long as I can remember I have wanted to be a mom, and to have the perfect little family.  That has never changed.  If I didn’t have it now, I would be really depressed.   I was always so scared growing up that I wouldn’t “find the right guy”, someone who wanted to marry me and have a family with me.  I was afraid to be alone and single and I wanted to have kids more than anything.  But I don’t know if I would have ever followed that path for myself if my SSA (same sex attraction) had manifested earlier in life as they do now.  So I am thankful for my family!

Also, since I have to be married to have this life I desired, there is one way I guess I did good in marrying the man I did.  I mean how many other Christian men do you know that would stick through a marriage with a wife who identifies with being a lesbian?  One thing my husband is good at is faithfulness.  I don’t have to worry about him cheating on me or leaving me.  He is in it for the long haul, whatever that may look like.   When this all blew up in our faces a couple years ago hard core, we actually threw around the D word.  Yeah we actually thought about divorce, seriously, for the first time, it was like… are we going to try to work this out or is it over right now?  As I sat there on the floor crying, knowing what I felt inside, and wanting that out so bad (because yes I wanted to leave, I didn’t love him anymore), but I couldn’t say yes let’s end it.  I could not let go.  Something made me want to hold on; no matter how bad everything sucked in our marriage, no matter how little good feelings I had for the man standing in front of me, no matter how strongly I wanted to go out and explore the new life I was beginning to lead, no matter that i finally had a group of friends and was enjoying something about my life for me, etc…  I could not let go of my marriage and i could never let go of God.

Now it wasn’t easy coming back from that situation, that place I was in.  But we went to a marriage conference and talked things out and worked on a lot of stuff.  Things got a lot better over time.  As i tried telling myself that it was all lies, none of what I was experiencing was real.  I was believing false information, etc.  I kept trying to push it all away and just focus on my life, my family, God, my walk, etc.   For a while that would work.  The feelings diminished, the realness of it all seemed to wane.  But then over time they would come back.  They always come back.  No matter how hard I try to ignore them or think they don’t exist or whatever, they keep coming back.  They are real.  They do exist.  I can’t just sweep them under the rug.  So i am constantly dealing with these feelings up and down as well as a marriage that is up and down.  When the marriage is down and the feelings are up it can get pretty bad.  Having feelings of hate toward your spouse while at the same time desiring something outside the marriage can really make things difficult.  I am glad the two don’t coincide that often.

Like last night… I am in sort of a high with my SSA right now but things are good at home.  Last night I was in a good mood and we were in bed.  I was trying to go to sleep since I was pretty tired from not enough sleep the night before with the baby.  Well once I started going to sleep I was no longer that tired.  So I decided to torn over and watch some TV with the hub.  I had an urge to go over to him and snuggle with him.  Now I am not a snuggler usually, and remember I am battling with my thoughts of women pretty hard right now, but it felt really nice.  I wanted to be with him in a real, honest, loving way.  It was cool I could enjoy that despite what my physical desires are telling me.

There have also been other times where I am really battling out loving my husband and being pissed at him for whatever reason.  But I will be in a really good place with my thoughts and feelings and I focus on what I want for our marriage and living for God, etc so I will pray a lot more and talk to people for advice and try to do what i can to make the situation better.

So yeah, from day to day things change.   So who knows what tomorrow holds.  I like my feelings, and I wanna be happy and enjoy life, but I also want to be a good and faithful servant to my Lord Jesus.  So I pray I make the right choices every day.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Dear mom...

We pull up to the apt I share with a woman you will soon despise

I tell you the truth.

…Not exactly roommates.

I can almost hear your heart beat faster

Your lips press together out of anger

Tears fill your eyes

You can no longer live in denial.

I have just ruined all the good I have done in the past 24 years.

Through your eyes, I am now a disgrace.

I wish it wasn’t the truth either, trust me.

An unknown burden has been lifted from my heart.

But it is now filled with fear.

Fear of being disowned.

You try to argue with me

As if you’re trying to change my mind.

Your too late, these arguments have been happening in my head for years.

It won’t work.

Yes, I’m aware the rest of our family won’t accept this

I know I have a few more hours- before word spreads

I’ll cherish these moments

Soon I’ll be without a family.

But in my defense

You told me to be happy

Well… I am.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

you're going to think i'm a total bee-atch for saying this

but my feelings for holly change when she’s in serious need of a haircut.

she knows i feel this way, so it’s not like she’s going to be mad when she finds out i wrote this (i told her i was going to anyway; geesh, ppl, cut me some slack willya?)  i mean, i still love her. but there’s just something that happens to her–her face, at least, and her general demeanor (at least in my demented mind)–when her usually short hair gets somewhat overgrown.

“why do you look so grumpy today, babe?” i’ll say to her on those days, or, heaven forbid, weeks before a long-overdue haircut.

“i’m not grumpy!”

“you’re not?”

“no!”

(my pestering, of course, leads to imminent grumpiness, which i can usually alleviate by suggesting we rent a movie or go buy ice cream or something.)

“are you  mad at me?” i’ll also ask.

“no! why do you think i’m mad at you?”

“b/c you look mad.”

“i’m not mad!”

(and then she sometimes gets mad.)

holly’s hair is not long by any stretch of the imagination. (you can see proof of that by looking here) but when it grows out i it’s like i can’t see her face!  i love her eyes. oh those big brown eyes. i just feel like i can’t see them as well when her hair gets “long.” you’d think she was a sheepdog the way i’m talking about this.

anyway, i feel a great deal of relief when she finally gets her hair cut at our salon in dc. (shout out to our peeps at BANG! whadDUP!!!) her eyes look so big and brown again and her face, oh that cute little face, it’s mine oh mine again. suddenly she looks cheery and i have my holly back.

she just got her hair cut on tuesday and i am still on cloud nine. she’ll be lovable for about…ohhh…three or four weeks. then i’ll start asking her why she looks so doggone grumpy again.

“it’s like it happens overnight,” holly just said to me [we're sitting next to each other on our couch right now; she's looking over my shoulder as i write this (go'way, babe! i'm trying to write!)]

“i think having overgrown hair actually makes you grumpy,” i just said to her

“no! it doesn’t!” she’s saying. “it’s you telling me i look grumpy that makes me grumpy!”

i think we’re at an impasse here. whatever, i’m just happy to see your face again.

[Via http://lunchat1130.wordpress.com]

LGBT youth domestic violence online survey - completion deadline 30th Sept 09

Broken Rainbow and Eighteen & Under (both registered charities) are producing a youth and LGBT youth domestic violence online survey. It is now online, and can be completed at the following link - http://youth.questionpro.com

The survey must be completed by respondents aged 18 to 25 years old and will gather data on their experience and awareness of domestic violence. At the end of the questionnaire (10 to 15 min to complete it), if they want to, respondents can be entered into a FREE PRIZE DRAW and grab their chance to win an Apple iPod Shuffle 1GB or a pop up Quechua 2 Seconds Tent! Third prize is a £10 Amazon voucher. 

This online survey is funded by Nationwide Foundation and the charities are working with the NUS to promote it. It will be active until the 30th of September only.

[Via http://proudtameside.wordpress.com]

Friday, September 11, 2009

Kevin Jennings, Assistant Deputy Secretary, Office of Safe & Drug Free Schools

Kevin Jennings is the founder and former executive director of the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), an organization that works to make schools safe for all students, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. Prior to his tenure at GLSEN, Jennings served as History Department chair and a history teacher at Concord Academy in Massachusetts and before that as a history teacher at Moses Brown School in Rhode Island. Jennings has also authored six books including Mama’s Boy, Preacher’s Son: A Memoir which was named a 2007 Book of Honor by the American Library Association and Telling Tales Out of School which was the winner of the 1998 Lambda Literary Award. Jennings received an A.B. in history from Harvard, an M.A. from the Columbia University Teachers College and an M.B.A. from NYU’s Stern School of Business.

 

Now for the bad news, listen to this audio stae workers in Mass education employees speak with 14 yo school children on sex, I couldn’t stomach anymore.  Warning, very graphic, but real.  This is what this organization is telling our youth in the schools ‘FistGate’

What homosexual activists in schools do with children part 1

http://www.massresistance.org/docs/issues/fistgate/tape01.html

part 2

http://www.massresistance.org/docs/issues/fistgate/tape02.html

[Via http://randysright.wordpress.com]

Thursday, September 10, 2009

You Wouldn't Want it Any Other Way

THE COMPANY fired one of my favorite people Friday, they fired him for some bullcrap reason, lack of production, but what he lacked in productivity he supplied in morale boosting.  So they fired one of my favorite coworkers and I met his replacement, Mr Slowsky, the comcast turtle…this is what he looks like, the comcast turtle.  I know what your thinking, you think Im going to rip him up because he took my friends job, but Im not, Im going to make observations about this grotesque   man/turtle…first for those who do not know the comcast turtle, I offer this clip as a photographic explanation

So a number of things jumped out at me when whatever his man/turtle name is offered his hand for me to shake

1)damp palms, soft, cuticles chewed

2) wart/mole the size of a golf ball on his neck

3)nose hair growing out of his nose and onto his upper lip like some kind of ivy

4)bad breath

and thats just from the neck up…during our time chatting (it was a requirement) he would constantly rock back and forth like he was autistic, I thought maybe he should be wearing a helmet so he could go bang his head against a wall…he wore a polyester shirt (obviously he doesnt know that if he spontaneously combusts that polyester shirt will emit toxic fumes endangering his new coworkers) the shirt was also a wee bit too tight offering the room AMPLE evidence that the air conditioning was working (gawd, I wanted to puke or at least get him a shawl or a mumu, tunic…body bag…) then there was the too tight poly blend SLACKS…that word is like BLOUSE its just a frumpy word…anyway the SLACKS were too high and too tight, he had successfully segmented his fat into an upper and lower region he looked like a pyramid from the belt down, he had created a fat skirt and it was not flattering.

So as we were working together yesterday he asked me three questions that made my bowels churn, are you married, are you dating, are you single..all in a four hour period those questions cropped up…I am concerned, I may have to kill him…or maybe I’ll just crush his spirit and take away his will to live, that sounds like more fun…

Its going to be a good day

[Via http://bolognaball.wordpress.com]

Sugar & The Medicine Man

The sound of your touch tells me I’m dreaming.

The curve of your lips rsvp inviting.

Your voice deep like the closest dance,

My mouth is blind ’round your en_trance.

I travel light with lips unkiss’d,

My wrinkled heart and pounding goodbyes-

This world’s mundane disguise, packed in a kip.

For your soft skin is a poem’s simple refrain,

And your honor is my only domain.

Alchamia, I breathe in the passion of your love,

As you sing meadow flowered scents and silent songs.

The ride is long, back from where we once came,

The animus carries us quick with a frothy mane.

Just as the greatest discovery everyone knew,

Once spoken, clouds rushed quickly

into the sky of the True.

The little kitten’s heads crown the bowl,

as the cream gets poured,

The alchemist’s stone scries vision

through the rock mind Lord.

I know that when we meet again,

The skies will open and reach out their hand

And we will travel together in our lover’s embrace.

Like then , like always, like now,

Love is full of grace.

Paris Chance

Sugar & The Medicine Man

This work by B. Chittim is licensed under a Creative Commons No Derivative Works 2.5 Canada License.

[Via http://mydomme.wordpress.com]

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

23-year-old actress plays the bipolar Silver on the reincarnation of "90210" on the CW network Jessica Stroup: Bipolar Role On "90210" Is A Challenge

FILE – In this Aug. 24, 2009 file photo, Jessica Stroup arrives at the premiere of the film in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello, file)

The 23-year-old actress plays the bipolar Silver on the reincarnation of “90210″ on the CW network. The show’s second season makes its premiere Tuesday night.

Stroup says she’s careful not to play Silver’s mood swings too over the top.

She says she did as much research on the disorder as she could because “it’s something that touches so many people but isn’t really explored.”

Stroup says some people “have reached out to me to say they watched and it meant a lot.”

Like the original show from the 1990s, “90210″ follows a group of teenagers in Beverly Hills.

“90210″ will air at 8 p.m. EDT on the CW.

___

On the Net:

“90210″: http://www.cwtv.com/shows/90210

SOURCE

[Via http://celebritymeme.wordpress.com]

Webcomics Wednesday: Blue by Patricia Grullon

Welcome to a new series, Webcomics Wednesday, in which I review comics of feminist interest. Most of these will be queer youth focussed because that is how my taste in webcomics runs. If you’re not familiar with webcomics, they’re essentially serialised comics posted on the web, generally published one to three times a week.

Blue by Patricia Grullon (sadTakara)

Blue begins when Chris finds a mysterious young woman collapsed in garbage outside her front door. Chris looks after her for the night and they part ways the next morning. A month later, Chris can’t stop thinking about her. And then the stranger turns up outside her door again, this time to stay.

Firstly, Blue is worth reading for a rare quality: its positive, rounded focus on young queer characters. Laci is a bubby teenager with a few things on her plate and a fair bit of insight into Chris. Chris isn’t sure of herself, but she’s doing her best for them both. And they’re just gorgeous together. We barely see characters besides Chris and Laci, which gives us a chance to settle into knowing them and their relationship slowly and well. (Although I hope we get to meet Gabby again.) Grullon doesn’t have to use flashy characteristics, she lets impressions and facts gradually build up, which is refreshing.

But it’s not only the storyline that has something to say. Laci and Chris start off with cookie cutter skinny bodies and faces. As the comic progresses, the characters move from generically pretty to gorgeous and individual. Laci is drawn as positively chubby starting in Chapter 2; I remember reading that this was always intended but not initially realised. Comic characters are so often visually interchangeable; this is part of a unique style that does Patricia Grullon credit. It’s a gradual but dramatic change and it’s interesting rather than distracting to see it develop. The contrast is best illustrated when you view the current header graphic and the old one (still on the fan art page through the link), which Grullon retired a new weeks ago. All the way through, the linework is gorgeous. When we come to the watercolour shading, it’s always just so. I often think comics look better in colour, but Blue is lovely in black and white – which is not to denigrate Grullon’s colour work at all!

At times, it moves at a pace that would be called slow for most comics, but it’s so engaging that you’ll keep coming back update after update. As in, it’s been running since April 2008 and I still have no idea why it’s called Blue, but that’s okay (maybe it’s not meant to be explicit?).

Usually I’m loathe to mention age for fear of being condescending, but it’s worth mentioning here. Patricia Grullon is seventeen years old and she has been a staple of the lesbian webcomics world for more than two years now. This is a testament to her truly beautiful art as well as her ability to create charming, lovable characters. It’s an amazing achievement for anyone, much less someone who has had relatively little time to perfect her skill.

It’s under 100 pages thus far, so if you’re looking to get started reading webcomics, this is a nicely sized introduction. (Because, trust me, with some of the comics I’ll be reviewing, you’re going to want to stay up till the early hours three nights in a row to get through the back issues… who, me?)

Light-hearted lesbian love drawn by a young queer artist – what more could you want?

[Via http://zeroatthebone.wordpress.com]

Monday, September 7, 2009

Switch

I feel powerful, like I could take down a giant. There is no alone or together, no part of and no groups, there is just me, and the world of humans is a blurry blood fest carnage of green; teeth eating the money, eating the trees and plants and rocks and things. I don’t intermingle with that blurry green gelatinous muck. I am free.

I feel weak and vulnerable. I go far enough uptown until I spy one of them, one of those unhappy married men who take me into the alley, and in one fluid motion it seems, I am suddenly on my knees, back of my head banging against the building in rhythm with his thrusts. There I go, stumbling a bit at first, feeling nauseous and dizzy, I’m finding my way to a dark place that serves, to feel my next bit of warmth.

I don’t like frills. I don’t even like how complicated our bodies are. Shouldn’t they be made of simpler parts, like tinker toys that can be substituted and replaced, mixing colors and genders and races until you get the desired combination. I feel like feather boas and earrings and such are fine, but I don’t like too much decorative frosting on the cake. I want to see the outline of her nipples through the diaphanous teal satin that snuggles against her as she stands there asking, “One more, Hun?” I like greetings and salutations like that, “Hun” or “Darling”, terms of endearment from strangers. It makes me feel like I’m family.

I was never really married, unless you want to count a short-lived shotgun type, without a father even present from either side. The clerk at the City Hall in Bendheath, Maryland helped me tie a Windsor knot – and my ‘best man’, a biker dude my sister showed up with, offered me the keys to his car and said, “Go now, it’s your last chance.” I never knew how serious he was, and I never took the keys. He joined my sister in holy fuckedupness, and a few weeks later, he beat the shit out of her because she tried to leave him. We all left Bendheath in a white knuckle panic the next morning – three of us – me, my new wife and my sister. Records, stereo, clothes: the few things crammed in my Mustang besides three frantic, paranoid white girls. Off we went, taking our honeymoon on the road. I drove the wrong way for 3 hours before noticing, and we all just laughed and I turned around, going back through that same free space we were just in – it felt just as good blowing across my face the second time.

I left my lazy boy recliner in my living room, money still owing on it, pure naugehide from some plastic cow’s ass somewhere. When I think of it now, sitting here in this bar, I have a flash of Steve Tyler pumping through my six by nines, and that purple swollen face of my sister, Missy Creamcheese in the back. She looked like a boxer after a hard days work.

O amor em paz.

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